Friday, 29 January 2016

20 of the worst and creepiest toys ever

20 of the worst and creepiest toys ever

we live in a world of hypocrisy. Children are not supposed to be exposed to violence, horrible and adult sexual images, yet the toy manufacturers are giving it a go
here are 20 of the worst and creepiest toys ever

20. midd piggy, despite the joyful muppet character, she expresses a big smile and happy wave when she is being turned into sausages. an important lesson in life for kids. pigs are happy to become your food.

19. Even pink cute characters have an internal structure. let's learn anatomy. skulls, and bones, and intestines and all that shite. very useful and educational.

18. how do we have so many barbie dolls in the world? a simple equation, , some of them become pregnant with little barbie dolls. so the kids can understand the adult world faster.

17. double head siamese twins with a third leg. very beautiful and creative, nothing spooky or creepy, if you ask me, if i see this in my house, i will keep it forever.

16. i always wanted to play with such a cute doll. frankenstein, meets the exorcist, or zombie factory or whatever. just the idea of a baby being cut, sewn in chains, decomposed and couple of bolts in the ears, so the idea of torture needs to be present from an early age. you never know when you need to torture your school mates.


15. someone spend the time to actually do this by hand. a very important education , do not get eaten by crocodiles. My parents did not teach me this important lesson. so I am at risk

14. some sort go ghost plastic toy, where you can remove the brain and the tongue. ghost has no eyes, no face. i would like to meet the sick people who created this to shake their hands and say ...well done

13. decomposing doll in coffin. what more important lesson in life for children than death. we need to know that we all going to die, so we do not worry about anything any more. very philosophical indeed.

12. i have no idea what the hell is this, how you can have fun, and that does it do. i see a handle, a tattoo, a hairy hole, I am not really sure what I am looking at. maybe you can help me?

11. a real chuckie doll very well executed. i have still nightmares about that movie and I am like 100 years old cause I say this movie 20 years ago.

10. Disabled doll with no legs, but wait, there is always hope. we create prosthetic doll legs as well, as disabled children should have disabled toys as well. it is only the right thing to do.

9. a nun, with a cross, blood on her face, not hers, but someone else's. so a monster indeed, hiding under the holly cape of a religious figure. watch out what you tell your children about this.

8. I always wanted an ugly crawling horned doll to look at me while I am in bed. i have no further comments, just that the world is full of geniuses.

7. you can buy this moulding dough to make sure your children  learn everything there is to know about poo, especially it is a toy and you can handle it without reservations.

6. I like this foetus toy box. they come in a set, because let's face it , when people make children it is all about the numbers.

5. beautiful ugly stuffed toy with important lessons about anatomy. just unzip it, get the heart, the lungs, the liver and intestines out and play. well done

4. one of my favourites toys ever, a bunch of rocks resulting from the destroyed plant of alderaan. so very exciting news, a bunch of rocks you can buy and play with. you know imaginary people have died on that planet

3. you probably have seen this, a more advanced lesson than a pregnant barbie, is the barbie with removable foetus. so this is where the babies are coming from. not doubt here. you got me.

2. another masterpiece coming from animal planet Chanel, a very innocent tiger, doing tis business, chewing a human hand after a good meal, hence the bones around it. do they come in the same pack, or you but the bones separately in a set.

1. the best lesson in life is how to drink alcohol responsibly. you start with replacing the beer with milk, but at least you get used to the idea from early days. when the time comes to taste the real beer, you will know son.

Question of the day, what is this called, and how can you play with it? leave your comments below